Friday, May 15, 2009

Why I take the Metro to work.

There are many reasons to take The Metro to and from work. Saves gas, avoid traffic, saves the environment, but all those reasons are bullshit. The real reason to take the metro to work is to meet crazy people and listen to them talk. Last nite I was reminded just why I take the metro to work.

Everything was pretty normal for the first few stops. I had just gotten a copy of the new Grizzly Bear album(im not just dropping band names, this actually goes somewhere) and was sitting in my usual seat praying that the drunks don't try to fight or throw up on me.

About four stops in I'm starting to think this might just be another boring ride when all of a sudden the doors swing open and in walks my saving grace. In a nearly empty subway cart this man, as if propelled by god himself, chose to sit right next to me. As he goes to sit down he flashes the biggest smile I've seen and says, "Hey there young blood!" Right then I knew we were going to be best friends forever.

A few minutes passed without incident when out of nowhere my new bff leans over and says, "Hey son, what're you listening to?"
I reply, "Grizzly Bear."
He responds, "What, like out in the wild just growling and making noise and shit!?" Which, might I add is the best possible thing he could have ever said.
Holding back laughter, "No, it's a band called Grizzly Bear."
"Oh shit man, well that's awesome! You know what else is awesome!? JESUS CHRIST!"
I replied, "Oh man, I walked right into that one, didn't I?"
After flashing me a confused look he goes into the most profanity-laced sermon on the merits of accepting jesus christ into your life that I have ever heard. It was incredible! Full of phrases like, "Jesus will save any motherfucker! He don't give a shit how hard 'a mothafucka you is! He'll still save yo' ass!" and "You should of seen some of the crazy ass shit I got into before I broke down and let Jesus save my sorry ass!" I almost broke down and accepted that mother fucking Jesus into my life right then and there!

As we parted ways at the Hollywood/Highland stop he shouts out to me, "Remember, get rid of that Polar Bear shit and get all up into some Jesus Christ!" With that simple conversation, I fell head over heels in love with The Metro.